Abu Sufyan ibn Al-Harith (The Prophet’s Cousin) (RA)
Early Life and Close Bond with the Prophet:
Abu Sufyan ibn al-Harith was born around the same time as the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ and he was his cousin.
Abu Sufyan ibn Al-Harith was also a foster-brother of the Prophet as they were both looked after by Halima Sadia.
In their childhood, Abu Sufyan and the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ were close friends.
Family Background:
Abu Sufyan’s father, Al-Harith was the brother of Abdullah, the father of the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ.
Opposition to Islam:
When the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ announced the religion of Islam publicly, the bond between the Prophet and Abu Sufyan al-Harith was broken.
Treatment Towards the Prophet:
Abu Sufyan al-Harith had a lot of envy and hatred towards the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ after this announcement
Turning Point – Approaching the Conquest of Makkah:
Just before the conquest of Makkah, Abu Sufyan al-Harith’ stance on Islam slowly started to change.
Abu Sufyan later recalled: When the movement of Islam became vigorous and well-established and news spread of the Prophet’s advance to liberate Makkah, the world caved in on me. I felt trapped: where shall I go? I asked myself.
Abu Sufyan al-Harith told his family: Get ready to leave Makkah. Muhammad’s advance is imminent. I shall certainly be killed.
His family replied: Now you must realise that Arabs and non-Arabs have pledged their obedience to the Messenger of Allah and accepted his religion. You are still bent on opposing him whereas you could have been the first to support and help him.
Decision to Embrace Islam:
Eventually Allah SWT opened his heart to Islam and Abu Sufyan al-Harith said to his servant, Madhkur: Get a camel and a horse ready for us.
He took his son Ja’far and they headed to al-Abwa between Makkah and Madinah.
Abu Sufyan knew that the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ was there and as he approached Al-Abwa, he covered his face so that no one could recognise and kill him before he could reach the Prophet and announce his acceptance of Islam.
Abu Sufyan al-Harith continued to advance whilst groups of Muslims headed towards Makkah.
Acceptance of Islam:
Abu Sufyan al-Harith went straight up to the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ and uncovered his face.
The Prophet looked at him and recognised him, but he turned his face away.
Abu Sufyan moved to face him once more and the Prophet ﷺ avoided looking at him and again turned his face away.
Avoidance of Abu Sufyan al-Harith:
Abu Sufyan al-Harith thought that the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ would be happy with his acceptance of Islam.
When the Muslims saw the Prophet avoiding him, they also avoided him. Abu Bakr looked at him and turned away. Abu Sufyan then looked at Umar ibn al-Khattab but even he turned away.
A man from the Ansar angrily said to Abu Sufyan: O enemy of Allah, you are the one who persecuted the Messenger of Allah, and tortured his companions. You carried your hostility towards the Prophet to the ends of the earth.
Seeking Assistance from Abbas ibn Abdul Muttalib:
Abu Sufyan ibn al-Harith then went to his uncle Abbas ibn Abdul Muttalib to help him and he said: O uncle, I had hoped that the Prophet would be happy about my acceptance of Islam because of my kinship to him and because of my position of honour among my people. You know what his reaction has been. Speak to him then on my behalf that he may be pleased with me.
Abbas ibn Abdul Muttalib replied: No, by Allah, I shall not speak to him at all after I have seen him turning away from you except if an opportunity presents itself. I do honour the Prophet and I stand in awe of him.
Seeking Assistance from Ali ibn Abi Talib:
Abu Sufyan then went to Ali ibn Abi Talib but his response was similar to Abbas ibn Abdul-Muttalib.
Abbas’ Warning to Nuayman ibn Al-Harith An-Najjari:
Abu Sufyan then went back to Abbas and said: O uncle, if you cannot soften the heart of the Prophet towards me, then at least restrain that man from denouncing me and inciting others against me. Abbas asked: Describe the man to me.
Abu Sufyan described the man and Abbas replied: That is Nuayman ibn al-Harith an-Najjari.
Abbas ibn Abdul Muttalib then approached Nuayman and said to him: O Nuayman! Abu Sufyan is the cousin of the Prophet and my nephew. If the Prophet is angry with him today, he will be pleased with him another day, so leave him.
Acceptance of Forgiveness:
Abu Sufyan al-Harith then said: By Allah, either the Prophet shows he is pleased with me or I shall take my son and go wandering through the land until we die of hunger and thirst.
When the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ heard about this, he went to Abu Sufyan al-Harith and said: There is now no blame on you.
The Prophet’s Instructions to Ali ibn Abi Talib:
The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ told Ali ibn Abi Talib: Teach your cousin how to perform wudu and about the Sunnah. Then, bring him back to me.
The Prophet Accepts Abu Sufyan al-Harith:
Ali ibn Abi Talib did this and when Abu Sufyan al-Harith returned, the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: Tell all the people that the Messenger of Allah is pleased with Abu Sufyan and that they should be pleased with him.
Participation in the Battle of Hunayn:
At the Battle of Hunayn, the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ went out to confront the Arab tribes with a large number of his companions.
Abu Sufyan al-Harith went out with the Prophet and when he saw the disbelievers, he said: By Allah. Today, I shall atone for all my past hostility towards the Prophet and he shall certainly see on my part what pleases Allah and what pleases him.
Abu Sufyan said: Allah knows that I desired martyrdom beside the Messenger of Allah.
Abu Sufyan took up his position and with his right hand, he protected the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ, preventing any attacks and with his left hand, he held on to his mount.
The Prophet on Abu Sufyan al-Harith:
When the Prophet saw the wounds that Abu Sufyan al-Harith had suffered, he asked his uncle Abbas: Who is this?
Abbas ibn Abdul Muttalib replied: This is your brother and cousin, Abu Sufyan ibn al-Harith. Be pleased with him. O Messenger of Allah.
The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ replied: I have done so and Allah has granted forgiveness to him for all the hostility he has directed against me.
Abu Sufyan ibn al-Harith’ Reaction:
Abu Sufyan al-Harith was very happy with this and he kissed the Prophet’s feet and began to cry.
The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ then told him: My brother! Upon my life! Advance and strike!
The words of the Prophet motivated him and he jumped into the enemy army until the disbelievers began to run away.
Devotion to Islam:
Abu Sufyan al-Harith never looked at the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ directly again because of the shame of his past hostility towards him.
Because of this guilt, Abu Sufyan spent his days and nights reciting the verses of the Quran.
Once the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ saw him entering the mosque and asked Aisha bint Abi Bakr: Do you know who this is, Aisha? Aisha replied: No, O Messenger of Allah.
The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ told her: This is my cousin, Abu Sufyan ibn al-Harith. See he is the first to enter the Masjid and the last to leave. His eyes do not leave his shoelace.
Final Days of Abu Sufyan al-Harith:
When the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ passed away, Abu Sufyan ibn al-Harith suffered with the grief he was experiencing.
During the caliphate of Umar ibn al-Khattab, Abu Sufyan knew that his time was coming to an end.
One day, people saw him in the Al-Baqi graveyard, digging his grave and they were shocked by what Abu Sufyan was doing.
Three days later, Abu Sufyan al-Harith was lying on his deathbed.
Final Advice and Death of Abu Sufyan al-Harith:
The family of Abu Sufyan al-Harith stood around him crying but he said: Do not weep for me. By Allah, I did not commit any wrong since I accepted Islam.
Abu Sufyan ibn al-Harith then passed away peacefully in Madinah at the age of around seventy years old.